if i can run in heels then i can drive
SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity?
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
When he goes down on me, he stares me in the eyes like a shark mocking it's prey as it devours it. Plus, his beard smells like dirty gym socks. This has got to end.
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
He snapchatted me the wine on the ceiling this morning
I just saw my 7th grade teacher at the club. We had a pretty good talk over drinks. Turns out we both like dancing on tables.
I was so gone I thought the cops banging on my door were kids from the party trying to get into my room... needless to say, I started moaning louder so they would take the hint.
How do I cancel buying spotify premium for two homeless people?
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
Come camping we have xanax and steaks
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
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