She just asked to stimulate my prostate, man law requires you come pick me up
Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
You're pretty and everything..but you aren't worth the DUI
We were making out and then he stopped and said to me, "Your ship is right there, why don't you take your people and just go?"
When I woke up in the parking lot today I decided it is not a good idea to hang out with you anymore.
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
That would warm my breasts.
In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
We took a walk on the beach after the bar, he held my hand and kissed me. And then I peed under a lifeguard stand. It was so romantic.
I just put on my bra while peeing. I fear this will be my big achievement of the day.
I feel fine lol. I tried climbing a tree but the branch broke and I got arrested.
I think I recall josh coming in to the room to tuck us in and give us a few condoms and I threw them back all furious and told him 'we don't use those.' Oh god
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
Who’s got two thumbs and just got laid in the administration building?
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