I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
I want to take you away to a place of dolphin rides and hot stone massages.
Sooo, his balls are like... bigger than my head...
Was waiting for the adderal to kick in then realized I had been brushing my teeth for eighteen minuites
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
It's a gift. Kind of like morning wood in my brain.
Please tell me I didn't help an old woman shave her vagina last night. Please.
That's the least of the fucked up shit you did last night dude.
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
Found a piece of twizzler in my buttcrack.
Sorry you had to clean the sheets with your macro notes
Ah, but I don't wear underwear. Every day is Commando Wednesday.
I miss seeing you
i hope for the sake of your safety you were not with your girlfriend while sending texts like that at 3 am
By the way, you're like fucking spiderman. I've never seen someone climb out of a car window that fast and eloquently.
Is it still sex if there's no nudity, no orgasms, but the neighbors bang on the wall and ask you to stop? I've honestly forgotten.
Randomize
