U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
I wish you were here to vomit in your hand.
And for 6 straight hours, I laid on my bedroom floor trying to convince myself it would perfectly acceptable to pee on my own floor
I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
How's work?
Spinning.
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
I want to hold her baby but I'm afraid I'll give it a contact buzz
I got concerned once i realized you weren't there to hear us having sex. See I do worry about you.
I will not be a drunk bitch. I will not be a drunk bitch. Chanting this until it's second nature.
Drinking in moderation can be fun. Drinking in moderation can be fun. Chanting this until it becomes true.
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
Yep. I'm going to buy a sex toy and a LARP prop on the same trip. Welcome to my life.
So, the officer that worked my wreck, I'm rockin his world tonight. He saw me high on morphine in the ER. So he knows my level of crazy. Think he'll agree to wear his gun?
So many things can go wrong tonight.
I got a 5/5 with my "I don't want a baby" rant essay. She said my use of the word "leeches" was a powerful metaphor :)
I'm getting 800 nuggets from McDonald's
Randomize
