As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
You kept tellin the cashier that this order was "To Go" over and over...even tho we were in the drive-thru
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
Dude, I think someone on your skype account may have seen me beat off. I used your computer and didnt realize you were still signed in. Please tell me no one was on...
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
I stopped hooking up with him and ran to the bathroom to throw up. He saw me throwing up and it made him throw up
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
Please don't try and hook up with one of your high school teacher's friends
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
I'm eating cookie dough with a tongue depressor for lunch.
Can we throw a "death to my 20s" party when I turn 30?
Sure. Funeral attire and hard liquor
She made kool-aid with tequila instead of water and rolled a blunt about the size of an Oscar Mayer hot dog. Best blind date I've ever had. I think I will love her tell my dieing day!
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