too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"
That's ok. I found a crab leg in my bed and have no pants on.
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
Our fuck buddy relationship took a turn for the worst after we were drunk and I punched him in the face when he asked for a three some with my best friend.
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
Jus saw ur date getting a bj in the mcdonalds parking lot...u want anything?
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
Technically, I traded a soft pretzel for sex last night...
I'm fucking sick of guys. I think I'm going to date myself. No drama. And I know I'll always put out.
Pretty sure my parents just hear me get off from the living room but I feel like they should be proud that I did it without a man honestly.
I was just at Kroger and saw some guy with a steelers balloon... ran up to him and popped it. NO RAGRETS.
I told you I couldn't sleep because of the speed and you rolled over and replied "shh. just pretend."
Randomize