I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.
dude just tell them you don't wear clothes. they'll understand
FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
Meh. I'll learn enough German to ask her for a handjob, then I'm out
You never cease to amaze me.
There's a naked kid on the floor on your side of the bed. Don't freak out when you wake up. I think we need to fix the lock on the door...
I want Paula Dean to narrate shark week next year
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
My getting drunk and marrying a stranger in Vegas final court annulment papers just came in the mail... I might frame that shit
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
You know where a good place to spend summer is? In your head. High as shit. It doesn't matter where you are.
my new years resolution to eat more toast and mastrubate more often is going well so far.
Cats are difficult to handle. Also they are impossible to baptize.
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
Randomize
