hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
I had a dream last night, there was a gumball machine that was filled with Oxycontin. I would try to get some but got vitamins instead. I was so frustrated!! woke up angry.
Kayla got stiches in her face. Rode in an ambulance shotgun. Tried to steal a baby, thought it was mine
Still want to know how you got back last night? Two Campus Security Officers carried you in around 430. Your pants were around your ankles.
I hate Sailor Jerry.
I think my sunburn makes my ass look bigger
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
I want to show up to tomorrow's study group looking like I got hit by a train. A train made of dicks.
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
He carried you out but the best part is you kept saying "can't I keep dancing" as you were gushing blood
I woke up on my girls floor with a pound of muenster cheese in my shirt pocket
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
you were on all fours in the front yard puking, but managed to hand the pizza delivery guy a beer and to have a nice day.
I'M SO HIGH I FORGOT HOW TO EAT A STRAWBERRY. A FUCKING STRAWBERRY.
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
Randomize
