We won't sleep together?
is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
Yeah but if I do that, I'd have to buy my own stomach pump for the house. That doesn't seem like a great thing to have sitting on the coffee table.
what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand
We've been here 3 hours and the only 1 word answer she didn't give was the drink order. Don't think I'm getting laid tonight
My neighbor just watched me eat a granola bar without pants, this is a whole new level of unemployed
It was pretty bad. Like cum-on-my-face-while-singing-Let-It-Snow bad.
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
like seriously. this whole place is the shit. like i can move clouds. no other way to explain it but i can fucking move clouds.
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
I've shit my pants 4 times in 12 hours... Never trust a fart when u pass 30
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
so i woke up at six am and his bathroom was flooded. i think i fucked shit up in my sleep.
I pulled you and a keg around in a wagon for like five hours and apparently everyone else remembers it but us.
Neighbor is sitting on his porch looking like he made some terrible life decisions and I just want to be like "I drank half of a handle of peach vodka in a shed last night. I understand" but I think they're swingers so his night probs sucked more.
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