It's so hard to take my boss as an authorative figure with her New Moon movie tickets taped to her wall
we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
My mom and dad are smoking a joint while lecturing me on what to bring and how to act in Europe. I'll finish this glass of wine and head over.
why is it ever time u get laid i end up having to clean something twice? you have no idea how hard it is to wash smugged ass cheeks off the counter
there not mine if that helps
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
BRING ME THE PLAN B. ILL GIVE YOU A FREE WATER BOTTLE AND A BUMPER STICKER AND SOME BACON BITS
On another note; I'm three days away from being 1/12th of my way from not having sex for a year. I need to get laid.
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
Just heard him in the middle stall. Sounded like someone emptied a toolbox into the toilet.
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
Dude I may be rolling but there's no way I can make up a 12 ft tall giant green man waving to me right now
False alarm, security just told me it's a radio tower
You told me you didn't want to go to the hospital because you were drunk, but because you didn't want to leave the "fun".
Randomize