fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
He doesn't need a wingman, he needs a miracle
At what point during this road trip should I let them know I've been drinking in the backseat the whole time and can't take my turn driving?
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
Sorry for rubbing my feet on you and repeating "good pony, stay."
Also, nothing screams "don't talk to me because I'm unstable" like walking around eating cookie dough out of the package.
it's finals week and we've been blasting country porch drinkin since 10AM. there's been like 4 tweets about hearin us on the other side of campus
Somehow my drug dealer is stuck in my air-vent and now everything smells like patchouli, weed, deoderant and sweat.
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
I called you a cum goblin in my voicemail. I stand by it.
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
How does one take the "you're the best sex I've ever had but I'm marrying someone that's sub-par in the sack" mind fuck?
I pity the fool.
Thanks Mr T.
He just kept pissing on the couch as we were yelling at him while he repeatedly told us "its going to be okay".
I could have sworn that I went home last night... but judging from the couch I just woke up on, apparently not.
Randomize