ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
I put my bosses number in my phone as "Do not call," I shouldve known my drunk curiosity would overcome any desire I had to keep my job.
again?
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
you just kept bragging about how there was a "pretty large" chance that you had pooped on the same toilet as George Clooney
Do you remember calling me and dedicating a shot to me?
Found a Safeway Deli Sandwich in the shower this morning... Perhaps the 9th beer was unnecessary.
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
You played Frank Sinatra today after we had sex. You moved way up in my literal book of men. Congrats.
They gave me patron and potatoes I couldn't say no
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
I woke up to rachel asking "did anyone else fall out of a tree last night?"
So were driving two hours to go to a club and Charles packed me a sippy cup full of tequila. He thinks of everything!
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