I just went to a chocolate syrup wrestling party I think you need to get on my level
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
I'd rather make snow angels in a pool of elephant shit.than sleep with him.
I've also decided that the true test of whether or not you should marry a girl is if she will willingly blow you while you eat Oreos.
So the next three days will be henceforth known as the 'celebration of the end of the most irresponsible years of my life' be prepared to wake up naked in a ditch.
YOU LET ME GO HOME WITH CREEPY RON JEREMY?!?
...and?
I hate when you're right.
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
We found him. He was passed out in a McDonalds booth with at least 6 big Mac wrappers. The employee said he kept yelling that he was in America and had the freedom to have big macs. Fucking Italians...
I swear to the sweet baby jesus I didn't fill your freezer with salsa and my little pony toys, but I didn't stop them either.
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
I had to put my dog down, accidentally outed my brother, and was given a fucking fish sandwich instead of a Big Mac ALL IN ONE DAY! Am I really the person you want to consult for advice? Hhhmmmmmm?
You kept shouting about how you were the king of all bitches...and doors, for some reason.
Today I saw someone riding a horse on the sidewalk by aldi when I went to walmart. Old town road was playing on the radio. It was perfect.
Randomize