I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
just apologized to a random stranger while waiting in line for coffee. last night was that drunk
Working out to an exercise video on OnDemand. Also, drinking beer and eating cream cheese with a side of bagel in between stretches.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...
Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.
I would just like you to know that the guy I blew off last weekend to come find ur drunk ass just got drafted into the major leagues.
Moment of silence for the loss of that option.
I'm laying outside on my patio attempting to get sun with a puke bucket next to me... This is dedication to the tan my friend
We should celebrate the resignation of Berlusconi tonight with too many bottles of wine and sambuca. We're allies, right?
We where late for the party because we spent the last hour staring at a towl becase we thought it was a raccoon
Theme for your birthday? Beer olympics in S&M costumes? Sounds like a nice little saturday
its like my brain is a tree and you are those little cookie elves
I'm a bit broke right now... Would it be OK if I pay you in champagne and Xanax?
How the fuck am I supposed to enjoy a third ice day from school if I only bought enough alcohol for 2?
I don't know, maybe act like an adult who teaches children for a living
It's like we're not even friends
She tried deep frying a banana by placing one, unpeeled, into a toaster.
Your skill with memes is vaguely frightening
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