It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
so i wake up and the chick who i had sex last night left her phone number. next to the number was a broken condom. should i call?
If the blowjob was before the wedding, we're not technically related, right?
Good lord, they've set up every firework to be ignited by a trail of gasoline at midnight. God save us all.
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
I wonder if i could put a dildo on my bike seat to encourage me to exercise.
I might've decided it was a good idea to try to steal all of the pool balls at the pub... I apologize in advance that we now need to become regulars somewhere (anywhere) else.
She got turned on by my fanny pack full of condoms. I can't believe you said it was a bad idea to wear it to the party.
Wait..I'm drunk and butt naked making a pizza. Happy Wednesday.
Though I don't usually want to turn down ladies who want to liquify my clothing with their eyes, I made an exception.
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
She came into the salon and said, "Don't judge me. Yes that's cum in my hair and I want a shampoo, cut and style."
My condom drawer is now filled with W-2s and tax return documents. Is this adulting?
I was just seen throwin up on the bookstore building near a trashcan by parents. Naturally I throw a thumbs up and say go college
Randomize
