It's pretty bad when the convenient store clerk can tell you that you're earlier than usual for visiting the store.
I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
Who is John, and why is his named carved into our toilet?
Midgets have it so easy. They have so much less leg area to shave.
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
I keep having to have that awkward "I don't want to have sex with you" convo. I thought wearing sweatpants was suppose to prevent this situation..
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
i want to live in a society where a 20 year old can wear pigtails and not get them called handlebars, because i look fucking adorable in them.
Do to my newly discovered condition I'm having to resort to emergency beat sessions to avoid the temptation to text girls I know are easy slams.
I'm gonna try Jim's breakup remedy this weekend.
Is that the one where you drink 3 cases of beer and rewatch as much WWE RAW as you can find? Or the one where you hookup with fatties on Craigslist?
THIS THING HATES MY LIVER
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
Dude I may be rolling but there's no way I can make up a 12 ft tall giant green man waving to me right now
False alarm, security just told me it's a radio tower
tell me about the fingering
Randomize