I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
It's a gateway drink.... Starts with wine... Then I wake up in my car with mascara on my arms covered in french fries...
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
Don't be alarmed at the kitchen mess. I had to shoot the fire extinguisher on the toaster oven, one quick blast. It was a matter of safe over sorry.
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
Oh man. I am high, watching The Office and getting pancakes. What a country.
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
Wait what do you mean I BOUGHT A FUCKING HORSE LAST NIGHT?!?!
Talk shit all you want but with my new knife sharpener I have a lethal razor sharp pizza cutter. Fuck with me Mario I dare you!
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