so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
Pretty people don't get stds, I knew it
i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
I should hang a sign above my bed that says "get hard or go home."
Dignity is for republicans.
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
Seriously... Things should be way more awkward... The entire female half of the bridal party INCLUDING THE BRIDE blew me in high school....
sorry for the naked aussie man in your room last night, he got lost on his way to the bathroom
This stranger told me I should "start playing for the other team" and then continued to talk to me about the joys of being a lesbian
I was grinding on my boss last night. So Monday will be fun. That's what's going on in my life right now.
You literally brought me back to life and then fucked it out of me
it was like where's waldo, only the stakes were much higher.
Randomize
