when people say theyve been sober for however many years is that like couple beers not drunk sober, or no drinking sober?
I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"
Somehow me showing up to/breaking into her house only to find I was a week early for the party became a night of weed cookies and sex.
Note to self: You can't deep fry cheese-its.
It looks like the misc $300 credit card fraud might have been our taxi cab driver who wouldn't take boobs as payment. No wonder...
the doctor said its the kinda of pregnant you dont recover from
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
She made me walk a straight line to prove i was sober enough to help carry you to the car
Knowing you it was perfect out of spite. Like. A line straighter than YOU
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
ugh I gave him morning sex and he doesn't even text me back for my bagel order
Are you on your way? Get your date and black out with me. Democracy's at stake.
Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.
Randomize
