I wanna crawl in your skin and have dreams about Bobby Kennedy tonight.
girl you didnt miss much. except me passing out for 3 hours AT JOBBIE NOONER on some random's boat. i was topless, then completely naked. heard girls were throwing ice cubes at me. i was useless. remember nothing.
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
Did we have sex last night?
I think that was the general idea until I got you undressed and you puked on me.
It took me 40.8 seconds to take a dump at her house, I know because I timed myself.
I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
You know its bad when you can over hear the planned parenthood nurses talking shit behind your back... they've seen everything
But like now everytime I pee I just think... wow I had sex with him on this toilet.
literally have a bruise on my forehead from being over the toilet all night.
I'm gonna win the lottery and buy chinchillas and tattoos for everyone
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
I had one glass of wine then passed out for 4 hours. It's like I'm having a quarter-life crisis.
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
I DONT WANT YOUR DICK. I WANT BRUNCH.
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
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