its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
This unplanned pregnancy thing is really taking all the fun out of football season.
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
You know we had a good night last night when today I opened up my Google Translate application and the language is set to Persian and the phrase to translate is "I want you to suck my dick".
Happy Birthday. May your liver respect you, fat bitches neglect you, hangovers reject you, and AA accept you.
Just so you know in the morning, yes you did send your bartender a snap of your boobs. No I didn't try to stop you because you used sound logic for doing so.
I mean, it's just pathetic when the standard is tinder and he can't live up to it.
He's going to wonder why I have burn marks on my asshole
Welp. June's off to a great start. I just ripped my pants, completely sober, at 10:30 p.m.
He doesn't like Sabbath and that alone is a GIANT red flag. Learn from my experiences and never, I mean NEVER associate with people that hate Black Sabbath and Motörhead.
Can't. I'm doing shots with my mom.
If you can give me an orgasm, you'll get a trophy.
He licked me while I ate pretzels and chips. I was really living my best life.
I almost suffocated in that mask but she kept calling me Jeremy so I kept it on.
Randomize