After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
Apparently he always goes for the wrong girl so it should be easy for me to nail him.
That was the most comfortable bag of doritos I have ever slept on!
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
Disregard that. She just puked into her boot and started screaming.
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
I saw it and almost just was like "Ice breaker: your penis is massive" but I didn't.
I'm a drunk white girl and my ancestors were drunk white girls, if we apologized our species would be extinct.
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
I woke up with a dread of barbecue sauce in my hair. Drunk munchies makes me a disgusting person.
Hell no. Last time I used a Slip N Slide I ended up with bruised ribs, a broken fence and the hatred of a half naked girl with a sprained wrist.
Whelp, I woke up on the front lawn this morning. I have got to stop wearing these underwear. Every time I do, I end up puking in someone's greenery.
dude, you ran into a window then asked ME what the fuck I was doing.
I’m getting back at my ex and training my new boy toy how to properly satisfy a woman. I’m killing two birds with one dick.
Randomize
