Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
Theres a baby at this concert double fisting pacifiers. shes gunna do great in college.
Apparently last night drunk me put my phone in a cup of beer to make it "fun scented".
Did you find any other hidden treasures in my room? Specifically weed? Or Slim Jims?
I call BS on that! THAT WAS TOTALLY AN INTERCEPTION. JENNINGS HAD THAT.
PEOPLE ARE FLIPPING FURNITURE HERE. IN THE ROOM ABOVE ME. I HEARD SOMEONE WOOKIE CALL IN ANGER FROM SOMEWHERE IN THIS BUILDING.
I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared, even a little.
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
Your biggest crisis right now is that you can't decide whether to keep hooking up with AN NFL PLAYER or try to rekindle your relationship with your ex. You are a walking white girl problem.
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
Well I had to use a seat cushion at Soul Cycle today so, yeah, I'd say the sex was good
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
I'm trying to find a place to hide weed in my mother in law's house...
Married life problems?
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
The date did not go well. Turns out I once set her brother on fire.
Yeah, everything was going great until the mugging.
When we were in Vegas he tried to get an Elvis impersonator to act dead on a toilet so he could take photos. This is even worse
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