I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
i need a wealthy benefactor or a cocktail job. or to start stripping. or kill myself. whatever.
I don't even know why im sitting in this office eating a poptart.
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
Apple trackpads and semen don't mix. On the way to the Apple Store.
Still burping lighter fluid. Totally awful.
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
I think I fell in love with her when I saw her kick a freshman in the chest
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
She told me she was the Publishers Clearing House of Dicks. Two dicks a day, everyday for life.
ED guy's penis finally worked last night. It was a Festivus miracle!
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
Don't read too much into what I just sent. I love you, always have, but I'm drunk and sorry for the confusion.
Which part? The boyfriend or the sex?
Boyfriend. SEX IS ON!!!
Randomize
