So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
If the pens lose tonight I'm gonna drive to Detroit and burn 8 mile to the ground.
Actually I may do that regardless. Probably get my own holiday.
Me liking this guy is the best diet ever. Do I want this cookie...or do I want to get laid.
i got last night's adventure to take the garbage out when he was leaving. my vagina is THAT good.
I'm not inviting you over anymore if my cat keeps ending up in the freezer...
i woke up this morning next to my toilet covered in an attempt to make blanket of toilet paper
he kept asking me if i had been in a pool or a lake recently, i didnt want to say i know where the swimmers ear came from. shower sex.
she's just sitting here eating cilantro out of my herb garden and watching some show about ducks on tv and laughing, what the fuck did you give her?
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
We played table tennis, but used tv remotes taped to our foreheads instead of paddles. Every time your opponent scored you took a shot. I'm the current champion as of last night.
If he refers to me as slump buster one more fucking time.
Pretty sure I scared her away last night by putting a vodka tampon in my ass
just made a presentation to 40 students and my professor about morals and ethical issues..still drunk. at 8am. I wish I could remember how it went.
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