you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
lets make a pact to never make a pregnancy pact
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
Don't be alarmed at the girl laying on your bathroom floor.
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
I succsesfully kept my nipples in my dress all night. Even when I got in a fight. I was made for the bar.
I may have made out with a tranny last night, which, if I don't get fired for everything else that happened, really makes last night epic.
Got laid last night using the intro line of "rate your hurricane evacuation plan on a scale of 1-10"
Just got kicked out of two hot tubs. We were naked the second time. So awkward getting out in front of the security guard.
My logic for bringing him home was, he's in law school so odds are he wouldn't kill me.
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
STOP FUCKING TELLING PEOPLE ABOUT THAT TIME THAT GUY CAME ON MY FACE WHILE I WAS ASLEEP!!!
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
(440): please tell me you didn't have sex in my dress.. IT'S A VIRGIN DRESS.
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
Randomize
