I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
FYI, your girlfriend is on her way to the ER. She tried to balance a bottle of jack on her chest. Smashed toes, blood all over patio. Call her, kinda funny though.
You told them that the brownies were safe, and then pointed to a passed out Ryan and said "see?"
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
Never ever ever ever ever ever give your number to a 30 year old at buffalo wild wings. Ever ever ever.
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
Traded my phone for pizza, then got it back this morning....successful night
Opening beer with my teeth is getting easier the drunker I become.
It turns out my teeth are bleeding.
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
We smoked with this guy who looked just like Hyde from that 70's show in an alley. It was a divine moment in my life.
Hey I had a great night last night but I don't want to lie to you I'm only 19 and that wasn't my place its was my cousin he's gone for the summer and I was just house sitting and watching his cat I'm sorry
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
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