I'm having a terrible night. Can I sleep over?
Too tired to pretend that I care : (
she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
He's such a gentleman. He didn't even ask why my bra was flung on the seat of my car. He just took my snow brush, pushed it onto the floor and said, "Let's go I'm hungry."
Sitting on an airplane reeking of booze, sex and shame while surrounded by families coming home from Disney. This is not one of my finer moments.
I just tried to roll over and fell off the bed. I think that is the beds way of kicking me out
A guy in a gorilla mask got blown on the lawn. And then the night got weird.
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
All that stuff they told us in middle school about drugs being easy to find was a bullshit lie.
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
I legit just quacked out loud at a duck on campus. Realized after that there were people around me, they looked at me funny...
Grandma keeps pulling a bottle of captain from her pocket and spiking people's drinks.. She just yelled "I'm DAMN HOT to be a grandma!" .. I LOVE HER.
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