you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
No matter how fun it seemed the night before you will always regret taking those pictures, you will always regret eating as much as you did, but you will never regret the great lengths you had to got to get those bruises.
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
Even his old football coach jokes about how big it is. I don't want to be alone in a room with him and that monster.
Spotted: woman loading franzia into a toddler-sized shopping cart for her child to push. Beautiful.
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
Woke up w/ the same freshman as last Saturday but we were sober this time. Is that a relationship?
I know how to say Yes, No, and Your Mother's Vagina. So almost fluent.
Suppose hypothetically u received a request for face time communication with a gentleman who looked astonishingly like a penis. Would you indulge him in conversation? Hypothetically of course.
This is my gift to your gina
Everything was cool till you started pissing while standing at the bar
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
I'm not allowed to have sex with him again. My vagina joined in on the protest. There was a petition. All my body parts signed it.
Also, I had mind-blowing sex on a pool table
GOD DAMN IT I COULD HAVE HAD A MOTHERFUCKING 3 WAY LAST NIGHT. WHY BOOZE, WHY?!
Randomize
