Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
Just took career test that listed librarian and bartender as top career choices. Fascinating.
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
Everyone is sleeping and i'm sittin here in my iron man mask, watchin chelsea lately and tryin to figure out how to smoke through it.
I just watched the lion king for the first time in years. It's like the equivalent of a really good blow job.
Some guy wearing a horse mask just knocked on my door and started whinnying. I opened the door and he was like, "...oh sorry, wrong room..." so awk.
I got really high and googled the history of Amish people for like an hour.
Ohh man. That was a snatch-waxer with a score to settle.
Do u like your dick pics shot in hotdog or hamburger orientation?
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
You kept asking us from the backseat if you were driving ok and then you kept talking to your hiccups and yelling at them to "stop it already!"
I'm high on the exercise bike at the gym. I feel like Lance Armstrong
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
Randomize