He said he had to make up a lie of why he couldnt sleep with her. It must really suck to have a sunburned dick.
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
Grindr hookup awareness: always make sure that you agree to blow one person and they aren't bringing a Friend/boyfriend. Shits weird when you're sober.
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
It's the 30 sec rule.... the worst that could happen is I could die
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
I went out with a plan. I came home with a Brian. THIS WAS NOT PART OF THE PLAN.
In 18 months of being married we've had sex with 7 different couples. Who said you can't have your cake and eat it.
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
Well my normal tinder strategy of "Will I have sex with her when I'm sober" has been paying off
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
Just sold my panties for 40 bucks to some rando dude at the gay bar. I think I found a way to fund next years spring break trip. Hello cancun!
He’s tiny, hairless and humps my leg when he wants sex. He’s basically a chihuahua
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