THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
I finally had sex with him last night, but we used a condom so it doesn't add to my number of sexual partners.
woke up to 35 texts all saying im cheating on her
me and last nights hook up spent two hr. figuring out a reply we went with i love you..
dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
I can't figure out how to get this beer bong in my carry on without airport security questioning me as it goes through the x-ray.
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
When you consider the sheer number of events that had to occur in order to prevent me from fucking her, there must be a god
Bro, he broke his neck diving into a kiddy pool.
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
He wants to make me arch my back "like I'm having an exorcism". Not sure if I'm turned on or freaked out.
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
Unless you count my weekly workout where I drink wine, listen to obscure/cheesy records, and pretend I'm a ballerina...no. I don't exercise.
For future reference: bathtub full of cheeseburgers = win.
Randomize
