it was all good till he told me to dance slow and quiet
It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator
That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
she started talking about my kids
was she topless?
Hey. Did u tell any1 that I use Nuvaring?
Cuz 1 of ur bf's frat bros just asked me if I wanted to "play ring toss later"
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
I think they can follow the trail of blood to my house if they have a problem with me taking a dip in their hot tub last night b4 stepping on a broken bottle
I'm in a pile of cheezits at an unfamiliar location watching dateline on tlc. Stage an intervention.
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
we're going to the olympic park to run the 100m yeaaaahhh
it's 3am. Nothing could possibly go wrong here.
You were a hurricane of blowjobs and glitter makeup. You came out of the closet and took the house down with it
wanna see your best friend chug a bottle of steak sauce?
please go to sleep
Never start off a conversation with "speaking of STD's..."
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
Randomize
