hey no worries the mystery has been solved- i jst sneezed and my undies popped outta my nose.
Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
best thing about halloween? there are pumpkins to puke in EVERYWHERE!
you were crying because peter frampton wasnt your dad
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
I just saw her take the entire bowl of lime wedges from the bar and pour them all in her purse, and now using the empty bowl as a hat. Waiting for security to come and throw her ass out.
I seriously think I got run over last night.. My sides are bruised and I got a ride home in the limo from the office.
His voice is like having sex with hot chocolate and then suddenly you're pregnant.
You know it's a good weekend when you wake up on Sunday questioning your sexuality.
Couldn't finish, so she gave me "the tap," and I had to leave the mound early. Nothing worse than the long walk back after the manager comes out and asks for the ball.
I called you a cum goblin in my voicemail. I stand by it.
Was so high at one point last night that while showering I was worried that using too much hot water would slow down our Internet.
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
Randomize
