don't go home with that guy from jersey
i know, not worth the blood test
We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
Remember back in the day when getting fingered in the movie theater was the best thing ever?
I hate how you keep a running list of people who have seen me naked.
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
It's the first day of summer. It's not a race it's a marathon. Pace yourself
Tomorrow night wont work for me. I'm talking with Bryan about marriage and I dont want to have a shroom hangover.
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
What do I do with all this pork broth? I can't waste it.
CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG
I pour the whiskey from now on
It's almost 5am and all I can keep thinking is IT'S WHISKEY TIME!!
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