I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
I thnk I just saw a monkey walking a drunk guy.
how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
i couldnt tell she was wearing a bumpit until she started giving me head
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
Vodka and Eggs at 9:30AM = thank you, America.
Dude give me 4 good reasons we shouldn't trade girlfriends tonight
His penis has a special gift of curing my broken heart
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
Printed off fake 'Producer' Sundance badges for us. Pretty sure they double as free passes for getting laid by 'actresses'. Testing this theory tonight.
About to go get a free burrito for kissing a bald man in public
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
I'm tripping balls on ambien right now and I still feel that's a bad idea.
Nothing like having your house arrest ankle bracelet vibrate and take a moisture sample at the exact moment you're about to blow it in some chick...buzzkill
Our orgasm ration was 1:45. No. Fucking. Joke. I thought I was going to die.
Randomize
