I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
Just shot my load on a stink bug. Thought you should know.
she told me she sucks everyone's dick but mine because mine is too big and "hard to suck" i need to reevaluate the girls i fall in love with.
I've never heard a "this is the reason why i dont suck your cock" explanation go in that direction
Im so hungover that my 6 year old cousine made me aspirine and coffee out of playdoh...
I could be wrong, but im pretty sure i jumped off the roof after my lighter.
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
I literally told her "she's a sandwich I'd like to make" and that's all it took
Serious question: when you had my right nipple in your mouth, did my nipple ring have both of the balls on it, or was it missing one. Current situation: missing one.
Everything was cool till you started pissing while standing at the bar
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
Know we haven't talked but having an orgy party on the 20th if you're interested. If not, disregard this text.
Who is this?
Afterwards he face timed like four of his friends screaming he banged the hot intern.
I feel like hooking up with you on my floor, sneaking out my window and jumping a fence is an effort that deserves a happy birthday.
I JUST WANT TO SIT IN MY UNDERWEAR AND WATCH THE BRAVES GAME AND NOT BE CONSTRAINED BY MY ED SHEERAN SHORTS
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