The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
i just saw a girl w/ a shirt that said "im the single friend." yeah i bet u r. stop wearing shirts like that and that could change.
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
Guy next to me at the plasma center is high and watching porn on his itouch. I am wayy to hung over for this level of poor.
Totally just met the chick getting nailed in our lobby last night. Should I bring it up?
He hit on a bridal shower w/ his hand on my tit the entire time. Gave his number to the mom.
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
Please root for the ravens. I now have oral sex riding on this and it's been sooooo long
I know he'd never cheat on me. It'd be like choosing Mexican tap water over Patron.
We mailed him an 18 inch double headed dildo for his birthday. The Fedex guys certainly got a laugh out of it.
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
I would have cried, probably tears of wine, but cried nonetheless.
I'm so glad you support me having casual sex with your uncle
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
I need my daily rules like rule one don't put your dick in the vacuum cleaner
Randomize
