Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
Imagine a baby lion feeding on an injured gazelle and it tasting fresh blood for the first time. That's me and this breakfast sammich
Omg calling you in 10 to update you on who I peed on last night
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
You made out with two different species that night
I think I'm drunk at the airport. Oh the possibilities
They gave me patron and potatoes I couldn't say no
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
You offered the police officer a Snickers ice cream bar and cried when he wouldn't take it...
I refuse to believe you if you're trying to tell me humanity as a whole isn't sad, tired, and craving Chinese food.
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos?
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
Randomize
