Apparently he's never heard a queef, he totally thought I farted and got freaked out.
i had a dream that your penis turned into a long neck dinosaur
did it start talking like on Land before time?
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
you think she would figure it out that ever dude that fucks her is just doing it bc they are in a contest to bang the fattest girl
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
Champagne is a vitamin, right?
im just gonna lie here and collect money in this whoppers bag while sprawled out on this bench and explain that its to buy weed for my hangover
The cops knocked on our door just to ask us if we were really having a no-pants party.
Her name means "flower that enlarges and gives birth." There is no way she isn't getting knocked up
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
Remember the golden rule, wine is for baths, and beer is for showers.
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
These rednecks don't fuck around. This party is completely BYOB and we now have 6 kegs, 3 of which have already been emptied.
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
Blacking out in the security line at the airport is not nearly as fun as blacking out in the lunch line at the dining hall.
Randomize
