if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
We can grow old together and our livers can fail together
i walked in and you were spoon feeding your sister grape juice out of a tupperware.
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
Be still, my beating vagina.
I just finished deleting miscellaneous contacts from my phone ... time for a HIV test!
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
dude to be honest with you there is a used condom that ive just left on my floor for three days
you have got to get your shit together
New life rule, no banging opera singers. I might be a little deaf now
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
There's nothing like telling your girl to hold your pants while peeing on your neighbors door
His hands kept asking for sex, but all I could think was "dude, this is going to ruin my high".
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
I blew past the Governor's motorcade going twice the speed limit and DIDN'T get a ticket. God wants me to get laid.
Randomize
