What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
We stayed up until 4:20 AM. The next thing I remember was waking up at 4 PM, like my internal alarm clock knew.
YOU COME FROM SAD WHALE FAMILY, DEEP IN OCEAN!
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
Why put me through the conflicting battle of being happy for your vagina but sad for my vagina for no reason ahole
This dude has batman tighty whities on over his cargo pants and he has the nerve to yell "fuck you bitch" up at my window.
MEG JUST LICKED A DRAIN PIPE. DAVE PUNCHED MATT IN THE THROAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN. I REPEAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN.
Nothing says "Happy New Year" like having to shit into a plastic bag.
you ate an entire watermelon by using a CD as a spoon, then proceeded to chuck the leftovers at some dudes car...
Ah you cut my boxers off with scissors, we're way past introductions
So I wake up to my ex girlfriends underwear hanging from the ceiling fan and the only thing i can think of is "what time is the game"
Randomize
