Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
His moose knuckle keeps winkin at me
I think im pregnant
I think you have the wrong number
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
Also, my phone autocorrects ENABLER to all caps. I think I drunk text the word too often.
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
I just sprawled out on my bedroom floor and cried while shoveling chocolate into my mouth.. I should not have Bacardi at home
The chlamydia really affected his face.
Pretty sure I'm going to hell because of our friendship
Last one there wins
Yeah. I don't know. I'm just gonna show up at her place on valentines day with a jock strap, box of chocolates, and rose clenched between my ass cheeks with "be mine" written across my glorious man titties.
sometimes i forget what nice tits i have and then i spend a month brushing my teeth naked in the front of the bathroom mirror, and i remember.
I just motorbotted some guy and my hair got stuck in his nipple ring...owww
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