omg, he ripped it...he ripped my vagina...best. night. ever.
We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
God you better not be texting me after just having sex with someone from craigslist
In the middle of fucking me, she said "Hold on, I need my Hulk hands."
you're surprised the chick that fucked you for a free cup has herpes. i don't feel bad for you.
Which is scary since we both think with our vaginas
She's trying to figure out what kind of dinosaur I am... Yay codeine.
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
Apparently I told a girl last night, that's she's super beautiful and I don't want to fuck she just deserves being eaten out
I have chafed skin from the handy she gave me. I told her that and she said return the favor when it heals. I'm in love.
Next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
It turns out my English teacher used to pose for Playboy. She's an inspiration.
I threw up a lot of peanut butter last night.
You texted me the words "butt stuff" 53 times in a four hour period last night.
Randomize