Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
i forgot how awkward it is to meet new people sober
The liquor store wont accept checks from us anymore.
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
Good. I hope they all got E.Coli from snorting coke off of some homeless prick's asshole.
You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.
We just laid there in bed together, petting his dick and repeating, "IT FEELS LIKE VELVET!!!"
I think I am calling out of work due to a hangover. I'm 96% sure there ISN'T tampon stuck inside me.
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
I just spent the better half of my Friday night alone, naked eating McDonalds. Not my worst start of a new year
Waxing your own asshole is awkward and difficult at best.
By the way I can not feel my vagina. It's like it's asleep. What the hell did you do?
Somehow I don't think offering me edibles is what dad meant by checking in on me
They're the hard candy kind!
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
Randomize
