Here's an idea...how about I take shots by myself and drunk dial you around noon?
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
You were pissed we didn't change the movie to Eurotrip so you kept singing "Scotty Doesn't Know" over and over until you passed out.
Please don't let me drink ever again. I apparently told him he could stay but as there was no room in the bed he'd have to lie on top of me and he'd need to anchor himself on with his penis so he didn't fall off.
The way I see it, everyone on campus has a fake, but I'm the only person who actually makes beer in their dorm.
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
I just try to date guys based on what I need like I am trying to find an electrician now
You gays are geniuses
hey, being drunk and dumb is my thing. Don't take that away from me.
This is classic penis vs brain.
There's times when I just want to bottle my farts for later they're so insane.
You had me at "let me see your balls"
Sometimes the most spiritual fucking thing to do is punch somebody in the face.
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
I just bought two 8 Balls of Coke from the chick nurse that stitched my leg together in the ER after my bike accident last summer.
Randomize
