I molested 6 butterflies tonight
I had a long pep-talk with my penis that ended in "I love you, I'll try harder and I'm sorry."
Did you dl zombie porn on my computer?
Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
Someones car got stolen, everyone is yelling, and im drunk just sayin yeah buddy over and over again
he asked me to smell his eyeballs.
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
I need to throw up and die. The order doesn't matter. I feel like shit
I legit had a 15 minute convo about dinosaurs with a guy at the bar last night cuz he was wearing a jurassic park shirt
i am craving dick and cupcakes
This Asian instant coffee I found in ur kitchen is like crack. Who knew I could feel my heart beating in my asshole after one cup of this happiness.
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
I threw up in 4 different Starbucks across the city before 9 am.
Randomize
