This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
His stupid grin looks like he's mid-ejaculation
you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head
I'm sorry for throwing the cheese everywhere, but it wasn't my fault. No one was enforcing disipline so not really my fault for not behaving
I peed glitter this morning and had a beard drawn on my face with eyeliner. Last time I do shots with gay Dan.
Every fourth of July I get sentimental when I think back to the one where we drove around baked off our asses crashing multiple cookouts listening to Team America's "America, Fuck Yea" on repeat. I miss us.
I can't talk to her. I know entirely too much about her genitals to hold a conversation without mentioning them.
Just asking. Could've given you a lap dance in a sombrero, drenched in corona and tequila.
God Bless cinco de mayo
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
I decided to start over my porn collection by deleting the old stuff. That was a sad piece of a pie chart...
He's far too busy staring into my soul to touch my tits.
Of course his mom thinks you're nice, she doesn't know you have sex for cheeseburgers
One time!! I like sex and food....
Randomize
