I woke up this morning in a strange bed with a kid with an accent playing with my feet.
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
Fell off bed. Face first. 10 stitches. huge scar on forehead. totally going to start telling ppl my parents died fighting Voldemort.
Dude. I have been looking at your movie history on netflix and it is like looking at the rings of a tree. Only instead of telling me how old you are, it tells me when you were stoned.
Dontating $10 to the Red Cross relief effort in Japan for every car bomb I take tomorrow. Yes, buying me a drink just became a good cause.
I'm handcuffed to your bathroom sink. Save me.
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
Nothing is worse than post drunken playoff baseball loss sex
Time is so short and I miss you. (I just watched that commercial where the people all laugh and get older and die.)
i was enjoying my post acid trip trance a little too much. i found $50 on the sidewalk but didnt pick it up. just stared at the bill cuz it looked cool.
someone picked it up and i stared at the ground where it was for probably another minute or 2
Just bought weed from the ice cream man. The kid in front of me got a tootie fruitie.
I can hear my family downstairs singing Christmas carols as I masturbate
He called me saying he got nice rims for his car so now we can fuck in style
I nicked my vulva while shaving and I'm about to go on a date where I will be having sex. Which bandaid: My Little Pony or princesses?
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
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