If there was an emoticon for a sad penis, i would send it to you
this must be what syphilis tastes like
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
We got kicked out after you decided to chase your shot using the soda gun behind the bar.
shes taking the breakup well, i walked in on her naked passed out wearing a turban with a bag of peanut butter choc chips in hand at 5 in the afternoon.
It's probably because the lack of alcohol in your stomach. Alcohol kills bacteria. I am a doctor. Trust me
Is "when in doubt date the guy with the bigger dick" a good philosophy?
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
Reminding you of hookups your brain is trying to suppress. That's what friends are fooooooooor...
Don't let me pee the bed... Its going to be one of those weekends
Why did two squirrels just run out from behind the couch?
About that.
You threw him in the dryer?
He went in of his own accord. Mumbled something about experiencing the blossoming of popcorn.
Randomize